New math

Capo 3rd 
 
G C Emi D 
G C G   D 
 
G  C     Em     D         G 
what's a pirate minus the ship? 
C      Em       D        G 
just a creative homeless guy, 
and an anteater plus a large hungry mutant ant? 
an ironic way to die 
and what's domain, domain, range (xxy) 
a kid with too much in his pants 
and two balls minus one, 
six titles at the Tour de France 
 
split a decision with long division, 
take the circumference of your circumcision 
live like your data and when you're all "set" 
put it all together and whatever you get 
 
         G    C  Em  D 
it's new math... 
         G    C  G   D 
it's new math... 
 
 
and what's a bag of chips divided by five, 
that's a Nike worker's meal 
and Santa Clause multiplied by "i" 
well I guess that makes him real, 
and the square root of the NBA 
is Africa in a box, 
how do you trace a scatter plot? 
you give the pencil to Michael J. Fox 
 
take the approximate moral proportion 
of the probable problem of a pro-life abortion 
live like your data, and when you're all "set" 
put it all together and whatever you get... 
 
it's new math 
it's new math 
 
 
and if you took a factor tree 
of the factors that caused my girl to leave me 
you'd have a tree... 
full of Asian porn. 
C-A-L-C-U-LATOR (see you later) 
mathematical minds make industrial smog 
and what's the opposite of ln(x), 
duraflame the unnatural log 
 
support the farmers with a pro-tractor, 
link Kennedy and Lincoln with a common factor (fact, or) 
live like your data...blah blah 
 
word problems 
 
if there's a fat guy in a pastry shop 
with a twenty dollar bill and he's ready to buy, 
in order to predict his volume change 
you'll need to know the value of pi (pie) 
and there's a metal train that a mile long 
and at the very back end a lightning bolt struck her, 
how long 'til it reaches and kills the driver, 
provided that he's a good conductor 
and if ten percent of men are gay and 
twenty percent of men are Chinese, 
what are the odds that a man chosen at random 
spends his freetime and mealtime while on his knees 
and if Kim is half as old as Bobby 
who is two years older then twelve year old Tori, 
for how many more 30 day months 
will their threesomes be considered statutory rape 
 
cause havin' sex is like quadratic expansion 
if it can't be split then it's time to stop, 
and havin' sex is like doing fractions, 
it's improper for the larger one to be on top, 
and havin' sex is like math homework, 
I do it best when I'm alone in my bed 
and squaring numbers are just like women, 
if they're under thirteen just do them in your head.... 
 
and new math